Beach Sloth asked a similar question not too long ago. Basically, a desire to not give in to the conformity that so often accompanies middle age. Do what you have to do to earn your keep, but don’t sacrifice your passions to the extent that they fall away like so many ornaments of youth.
It’s important to do this. We live in a bleak world. Be who you are to the greatest extent that is realistically possible given the material exigencies of life.
A few months ago, renowned blogger Beach Sloth (http://beachsloth.blogspot.com) asked me this question at Formspring. I’m reposting it here for the benefit of the blogosphere, and also I kinda think it’s important. Y’all are gonna get older like me too some day.
How did you evolve into a cool Dad? I don’t want to grow up into an uncool Dad. Let me know what I can do to prevent this awful scenario. I’m trying to plan for my cool Dad future, kind of like a 401K of altness. - @Beach_Sloth
I think really early on in my alt existence I knew I would never be a mainstream bro. I would still go see bands whose music I liked, read philosophy, watch non-Hollywood films, and hang out with people whose personalities and interests weren’t narrowly confined to prescribed societal roles. And so here I am some two decades later, a cool dad bro. The only way you could become an uncool dad is if you willfully disavow your ‘altness’. I’ve seen your blog, BeachSloth, and that ain’t gonna happen. Rest easy, bro.
Some people think that as they get older and take on more responsibility in their career and family life, they have to leave the signifiers of their younger self behind. There’s no reason for this. Sure, one might not be able to stay out late during the week anymore (losing ‘relevancy’), but that’s no reason to completely give up on the stuff that makes you who you are. All too often people get caught up in confusing their chosen societal role or career with their true self. This is what Sartre called “bad faith.” People who turn heel in this way (like Zebraman) were probably destined to be lamestreamers anyway. Eff those people.
To me, being alt isn’t just about trying to stay relevant by being up on the latest buzzbands. It means you don’t buy into the mainstream’s version of the good life. Unless you want to ride Waldenwaves it’s nearly impossible to completely divorce yourself from the mainstream; we all have to make a living somehow. But that doesn’t mean the actual *living* has to stop when you ‘step up to the plate’ and take on a career.
‘Don’t let them own you’. – some alt
I’m going to evolve beyond the Cool Dad Bro persona/gimmick soon. It’s been fun, but honestly I think I’ve done as much as I can do with it. I have a RL twitter that I will point y’all to soon and will be starting a new blog. One can only do/say so much as a gimmick. Stay tuned!
At some level of introspection, almost everything we do seems bleak:
Checking your email seems bleak.
Separating the recycling seems bleak.
Having children seems bleak.
Updating your Facebook status seems bleak.
Doing the laundry seems bleak.
Looking for a job seems bleak.
Going to the gym seems bleak.
Obsessively refreshing @Mentions on Twitter seems bleak.
Paying utilities seems bleak.
Windows 7 seems bleak.
Relationships seem bleak.
Trying to connect with other humans seems bleak.
Spending time on the internet seems bleak.
Open mic performances in coffee shops seem bleak.
Politics seems bleak.
Eating at chain restaurants seems bleak.
Dressing up for social functions seems bleak.
Watching YouTube clips seems bleak.
Planning your 401(k) contributions seems bleak.
Going grocery shopping seems bleak.
Business casual seems bleak.
Reading HRO seems bleak.
Watching Lost seems bleak.
Nostalgia for smoking in the workplace and illicit affairs via Mad Men seems bleak.
Obsessively doing something with your iPhone seems bleak.
Downloading mp3s seems bleak.
Following Tumblrs seems bleak.
Going to shows alone seems bleak.
Watching movies at multiplexes seems bleak.
Riding the subway seems bleak.
Traveling by car on freeways seems bleak.
Walking the dog seems bleak.
Mowing the lawn seems bleak.
This is the first in a series of posts about the phenomenon of ‘seems bleak’, and what we are to do about it as ‘alt’ and/or ‘mainstream’ humans. More to follow.
Right now I’m using this mostly as a way to follow other blogs and reblog interesting content. Still not blogging ‘for reals’ yet, but if there’s something you’d like to see me blog about, please make a suggestion via the Ask box.
This blog, if it becomes one, won’t be a repetition of Hipster Runoff. I am not Carles and can’t replicate what he does, nor do I have any desire to. It’ll probably start off as a meditation on ‘alt’ from my older ‘cool dad’ perspective, from someone who’s lived though many succeeding eras of alt (I’ve already started doing this via my formspring).
That’s all for now. When I make my first post I will announce via my twitter. Till then, stay relevant.
Future tumblr presence of Cool Dad Bro if and when i make a blog. Till then just twitter me, y’all.
